Remember different things regress people differently but there are a few almost universal signs and signals that we are heading into our past histories. These signals are for both the one triggering the regression and the one who is feeling regressed.
STORY TIME
Here’s an example: James is a boss, who is experiencing his own regression. His company is in the red, business is off by 40%. On Friday afternoon, he says to his employee, Alex, “I want to see you in my office first thing Monday morning.” What does Alex do? If statements like James' triggers an emotional memory like the one Alex has of his mother saying something like, “Wait until your father gets home”, or “The principal is out today but he will deal with you Wednesday,” Alex will begin Story Time.
All weekend long he will make up stories about what his boss wants to talk about. Perhaps it was the fax paper he took home? No, wait. It was the personal charges made on the corporate card, or maybe worse—termination. With each worst case story, Alex gets angrier and angrier and then finally settles into rage. No one in the history of employment has ever made up the story, “Hey, I bet he wants to talk about that raise I so readily deserve.” When Alex exhausts all possible stories and gets to James' office he is exhausted and feeling about five inches tall.
Question: What story or stories do you tell yourself when your spouse doesn't call like they said they would or your children stay out later than they are allowed?
In Tomorrow's Lesson 42 we will continue with part II of Story Time and Regression and Rage.
For more information go to johnleebooks.com and read The Anger Solution: The Proven Method for Attaining Calm and Developing Healthy, Long-Lasting Relationships, Facing the Fire: Experiencing and Expressing Anger Appropriately, The Missing Peace--all available on Amazon.com.
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